The Open Notebook of an Atypical Teenager

Okay, I just found two more and I thought they were hilarious so I had to add them here:

“If it wasn’t for golf , I’d probably still be a caddie” – golfer George Archer

“ANNE BAXTER PROUD OF HER GRANDFATHER’S ERECTIONS” – headline for an article about actress Anne Baxter (and her pride in having architect Frank Lloyd Wright as her grandfather)

Man, that last one is priceless.

Okay, I’m at a total loss of what to post, so I will list some very stupid quotes:

“She is numb from her toes down” – written on a medical chart in a South African hospital

“Memorial Walkway-Do Not Walk” – sign by a path leading up to a memorial in New York

“”People focus too much on colors. It could be numbers, it could be animals.” -homeland security director Tom Ridge, on proposed changes to the color-coded terrorist warning system

“2 LAYS FOR $1″ -sign at a gas station in Minnesota

“We now have exactly the same situation we had at the beginning of the race, only exactly the opposite.” -sportscaster Murray Walker

“HERE-GOOD FRIDAY-7 P.M.-LIVE CRUCIFIXION” -sign outside a church in Minnesota

“DO NOT CLIMB” -label on a key ring clip

“Sweet Macapuno Balls (gelatinous mutant coconut)” -menu item in south korea

“I can’t help you. I’m in customer service.” -overheard at a customer service desk at a Wal-Mart in Texas

Wow, I’m having serious issues with blog topics… my “writer’s block” continues, but for now, I will complain about summer reading.

Gah! It’s so annoying. It’s supposed to be SUMMER… relaxation, homework-free… but no. I have to read 3 books over the summer. Lesse.. for honors english I have to read “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde” by I don’t know, and “Fahrenheit 451″ by Ray Bradbury (?). It was originally going to be 1984, by George Orwell, but I’m glad they changed it because I had started reading it and it was very boring. My complaints: if you’re actually going to make us read (not for pleasure) over the summer, make it interesting so it seems like it’s for pleasure. 1984 and Fahrenheit 451 are tedious and boring books… I don’t know about Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, but basing off the story line it can’t be that boring.  But honestly, *sigh*, it’s summer. Let we kids have some FUN. 

Now, for AP world history, we have no summer assignment (thank god), but we have to read “A history of the World in SIx Glasses”, by Tom Standage (?).  This sounds like an attempt to make history interesting (it goes through the world by beverage: the early americans and beer, the romans and wine, the arabs and spirits, central americans and coffee, the chinese and tea, and the modern world and coca-cola).  Seems okay, but, to be frank, any book with the phrase “History of the World” canNOT be interesting. Also, it sounds like a textbook. Who in their right mind would want to read a textbook (at all, but especially over the summer)?

I understand that sometimes in advanced classes, the reading is expected to be done outside of class, and sometimes there is not enough time in the school year to read them all within the 9 months allotted for school, but please, make the books we HAVE to read during the summer interesting. We’re still kids.

Sorry for the most extreme lack of posts ever! Gah! I’ve been busy doing nothing this summer. Also, I get sorta dumb over the summer, and I have absolutely nothing to write about. Except the summer TV shows going on right now!

Number 1: America’s Got Talent. I love the show for it’s hilarity and being very upbeat. The host, Jerry Springer, is generally quite funny and keeps the show in good spirits. I love seeing people’s idea of “talent”, and how Piers chooses to say “you suck” in a nice way. The judges are varying and funny, and the turnout is huge. It’s pretty good. 3.5/5

Number 2: So You Think You Can Dance. This is a new one for me, I just picked this up this year. Interesting. The host, Cat Deeley (correct me if I’m wrong), is sorta funny, but keeps the show in shape. THe judges are very professional, but I simply cannot STAND Mary Murphy’s annoying laugh and voice in general! It is very high and obnoxious. But what they say is nice and constructive. I like that the dancer participants are actually semi-professional, with dance experience, rather than random people that can suck (Dancing With The Stars).  The overall production of the show is nice, but not exemplary. The intro is sorta lame. But that’s superficial. 4/5

Number 3: Hell’s Kitchen. Very funny. Hysterical, actually. The idea is myeh, but the execution is pretty awesome.  Most of why I like it is because it’s funny, but hey, this is the ENTERTAINMENT industry. 3/5

Number 4: Big Brother. Not until sometime in July, but judging off the past 9 seasons, it’s okay. Very stupid idea. Okay execution. Somehow addicting. Pretty much all drama, but there are some entertaining competitions and stuff. For those that don’t know what it’s about, check cbs.com somewhere. 3/5

A few others, Last Comic Standing, The Mole, etc. are mentionable, but not particularly amusing. Overall, this “late spring, early summer” TV season is 3.5/5 

Not bad, but could be better. I keep myself entertained with some of the better ones, AGT and SYTYCD.

I just did the coolest thing ever.

Okay, so, in short, I downloaded a program off the internet called DarwiinRemote that will allow my Wiimote to connect wirelessly to my computer. It records button pressing along with movements made by the wiimote itself. Then, using motion sensor technology, I can literally make the wiimote my mouse, and assign buttons on the Wiimote to buttons on the keyboard, or mouse.  It is THE coolest thing.

Screenshot:

You have this whole list of commands for your wiimote (including, amusingly, turning on the LED lights on the bottom of the Wiimote). 

It’s so sick. Pretty much the point of that was to do Wii Headtracking , which works only with a special program created by Johnny Chung Lee, which is a ‘.exe’ file, working only windows. So, I was pretty bummed that I couldn’t do Headtracking, but this is still pretty awesome.

So when Spore comes out, I can play Spore with the WiiMote!!!! Hoorah!

Okay, I sorta just realized that I’m not using tags or categories. Just for the record, I’m asking you all: would it be better if I did? Do you want me to?

Sorry for the second consecutive short post in a row.

Okay. Scroll all the way to the bottom of this page. RIght now. Do you see it, at the very bottom, tiny and centered?

..FOR SUMMER!!! *da dun dun da dun dun da dun dun DUN!!* Yep. School’s out, by Alice Cooper?

WOOHOOO!! Yeeeeeeehawww!! Hello, summer!!!

Yay. No more school, no more lab reports, no more impossible math test (for 3 months). Just REEEELAXATION. 

Oh, but I will be moving in the middle of the summer, so that’s sad.

BUT IT’S SUMMERR!!!

Sorry about the extreme lack of posts, it’s finals week! And I have an impossible math final coming up.. hooray. So, when school’s over and I have some fresh ideas, I’ll stat posting again. Also, here’s a depressing counter that shows how long until I move! 

Whoa! I’m so flattered! Someone ACTUALLY referred my blog! WOW. I feel so… noticed. See?

Yep. That just made my day.